The Old and the Young
I’ve always been drawn to old people and small children. In general, you know where you stand with them. There’s usually no guesswork involved.
They either like you or they don’t and neither group seems to have any qualms about letting you know which category you fall into.
And you aren’t expected to be anyone other than who you are.
The very young are full of youth and exuberance, eager to learn (play), full of life.
The very old have experience, wisdom, and often a sense of humor that comes from the knowledge that none of us are getting out of this alive.
There are no politics, no cloak and dagger. It’s just you be you and I’ll be me.
I’ve always loved spending time with kids-they’re so up front and authentic. Although they haven’t yet learned the ways of the world, they can spot a fake a mile away.
I’ve always loved spending time with old people. They have experience and perspective and usually some really great stories and they don’t necessarily feel like they have to fill the air between you with words.
The very old and the very young don’t care where you live. They don’t care what kind of car you drive. They don’t care how much your shoes cost.
They care if you can come out and play. If you’re willing to spend time with them. How you make them feel when you’re around.
Somewhere between early childhood and old age, we seem to forget how much we need each other. We think we can do it all, be it all, have it all–all by ourselves.
While that illusion can be very attractive, it’s far from true.
Children and old people know that.
We all need love and acceptance and a soft place to land when life gets crazy.
We need each other for companionship, support, and to be seen and heard.
We need a little attention now and then with no strings attached so we can feel a genuine acknowledgement of our existence and approval within the community.
In the in-between–when we’re feeling so independent– we can take a lesson from the young and old alike.
Be who you are.
Make time to play.
Spend some time really enjoying the company of others–just because.
Enjoy and appreciate life for the gift that it is.
~~~
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This particular sentence: “They care if you can come out and play.” was the one that ‘got me’. When I first lived in East Aurora, late summer of 1963, the family across the street had young children. I lived in an upstairs apartment, and the folks who lived downstairs were an older couple: they owned the home and the land, and mister was a retired nursery (plants) man. The missus’ way of dressing reflected her religious upbringing as Mennonite. Both he and she were so thoughtful and kind. Bessie told me about some of the little girls from across the street, who frequently visited she and Fred. They would come over, knock on the door, and ask her: ‘Can Mr. (name begins with a R) come out and play?’ And of course he could. Thank you Carol, for the reminder. I too have long had a love for littles and old persons. Most of my paternal aunts and uncle were around the same age as my maternal grandparents, and my maternal aunts had lots of littles, some of whom I babysat. Most were sons of an aunt only 11 years older than I was, and since Nancy babysat me (for free, of course), I returned the favor by babysitting for her! I was godmother at the age of 12 to that first son, too.
I remember sitting on the front porch with Mr. R with my feet dangling from the chair. I loved sitting there with him shucking peas from his garden. (We were allowed to eat all the fresh peas we wanted) To this day I love raw peas and shy away from cooked peas.
Aunt Judy,
They were indeed a sweet couple. I loved sitting on the front porch in a rocking chair with Mr. R. in a chair beside me just enjoying the day. They were special people and may have been single-handedly responsible for my love of old folks! I miss those days, but I’m so thankful to have had them.
I love that we share that love of those on the far ends of the spectrum and how sweet that you got to be a Godmother at 12!
Life is sweet. God is good! ❤
Oh Carol, I love this writing. I agree with everything you said. The young and old have always been my favorite groups of people. As you know from my replies before, I spent every Thursday afternoon at the local nursing home with my mother leading singing time with the residents. They loved it and it always put a smile on my face to see them and my mama so happy. I was also fortunate to have two grandmothers live into their 90’s and oh what conversations I had with those two over the years. I am sitting here smiling at the laughter we shared and the wisdom that was passed along my way about many things in life. I am so fortunate to have had so many children in my life through the years, even though I have no biological kids of my own. I am an aunt, a great aunt, an adopted mama to several families and children. I love every minute of conversations and playing with the little ones. Whether we are baking cookies or a pretend cake on their toy stove, coloring or pushing them on the swing set, throwing a ball, its fun for all of us. Both groups really have no expectations from you except when we are with them to just be very present with them. I believe both groups just love you being present and engaged in any kind of conversation with them. It makes them feel important and wanted and loved. These conversations are free and don’t cost a dime and all parties are usually receiving happiness and blessings during those times together. One thing I have really noticed in my older age, is that just a hello to a much older person at the grocery, just seems to make most of them smile. It is just natural for me to speak to everybody. It just makes me happy. Let’s face it, a lot of older people live alone, so just being present and saying hello to both young and old usually creates much happiness for all. God bless you my friend. Keep enjoying this beautiful spring weather and enjoying digging in the dirt. Love you girl.
Thanks Susan, I couldn’t have said it better! Love you…c ❤
You got me with that beautiful photo of your father playing with the baby. It tugged at my heart strings for sure! Did Mr. R live across the street from you? I remember a friendly old man, possibly a relative of Bill Lundell’s. When covid lockdown started, I realized that I should check on the older people in the neighborhood, but then I realized that I was one of the oldest people on the block! Still not old enough not to care about politics, but I’m looking forward to that.
Beautiful piece, as always.
Nancy
Nancy,
It took me forever to find that photo! I’m glad you liked it!
Bill Lundell’s grandfather, Mr. Ulmer lived in the yellow house directly across from mom and dad’s. Mr. Ralyea lived next door in the Thur’s house. He was always so sweet, and so was Mr. Ulmer! Old folks rock!
God bless you for thinking about the old folks. It would suck to find out you were the old folk if it wasn’t so funny! But that was a sweet thing to think of. Do your duty and take care of yourself!
I’m glad you enjoyed the piece and thanks for chiming in. I love it when that happens! ❤
(you don’t have to post this)
You changed the photo. I’ve never seen this one before. I love it!
It’s the photo I wanted but couldn’t find. When I finally found it, I did the old swaperoo! It’s papa and Logan in 2009!