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In A World Such As This

When I was in boot camp, I remember one particular barracks inspection we had.

The majority of us scrubbed and cleaned and swept and folded and waxed to make sure we were found to be satisfactory.

There were two girls in our unit who just liked to boss people around and when they weren’t doing that, they were out on the smoking deck having a cigarette or twelve.

They did absolutely nothing to help.

At the end of the day, they were front and center taking credit (or rather giving themselves credit) for the great job the rest of us had done.

The Company Commanders were fawning all over them telling them how much they appreciated their hard work and dedication.

I, on the other hand, got a dressing-down for putting all the UNSAT (unsatisfactory) items in a cabinet in the office.

As the Yeoman of our unit, I had access to the regulations manual. I knew that we were allowed one cabinet that could be excluded from inspection.

I simply used that knowledge to our advantage and let the others bring the items they were unsure of to be placed in the cabinet.

The Company Commanders were worried that the inspector might look in the cabinet. How were they trying to train us when they didn’t even know the rules?

I grew up in Mayberry for heaven’s sake. This kind of thing shouldn’t happen. The people in charge are supposed to be knowledgeable and trustworthy.

As everyone else–Company Commanders included–celebrated our victory out on the smoking deck, I sat against the wall behind my rack shaking my head and quietly wept.

~~~

Fast forward forty-two years to 2020.

I’ve been trying hard to reconcile the world we are living in today with the ideal I’ve always held in my mind.

I understand that the world has always been short-sighted and uneven. I know there are people who are only out for themselves.

In contrast to that, the majority of people I know are good and decent people.

Hard working people.

Caring people.

But I’m left with that feeling I had back in boot camp.

The emptiness and sadness I feel when those in charge have only half an idea of what they’re doing and instead of admitting it, they try to create smokescreens to hide their incompetence and then reward those who tell them what they want to hear but ignore the truth tellers.

A small group of self-serving people can ruin it for everyone.

In my sixty-three years on this planet, I have not been able to figure out how anyone can justify making themselves appear to be more by making someone else appear to be less.

~~~

In these trying times of Covid-19, George Floyd (the most recent in a string of many), protests, and rioting, my heart is heavy.

I have seen people I’ve known for years call each other stupid, moron, idiot, and the like over political differences.

I’ve seen people I know spreading conspiracy theories like they’re facts.

I’ve heard people say Covid-19 is a hoax. (Please explain that to all the families who are mourning the loss of loved ones.)

I have watched peaceful protests turn violent. (I’m assuming the protesters and looters/rioters are different groups of people.)

Bad cops have killed good people. Bad people have killed good cops in retaliation.

I know that’s oversimplified, but how does retaliating against someone who had nothing to do with the inciting incident ever equal justice?

As my dad frequently told the six of us kids, “Children, love each other.”

~~~

In the world I want to inhabit, there is love. There is friendship. People respect each other and when they have different opinions, they discuss instead of argue or call each other names.

In the world I want to live in, people don’t care about your color, they care about your heart.

Everyone gets the opportunity to discover who they are and find their passion and live their best life.

We share our joys and sorrows with each other. We are always working together to improve what can be improved.

There is no fear.

~~~

People have always told me that’s not how the world is. I say maybe that’s the way it should be and I act accordingly to the best of my ability.

As long as I have breath I’m going to love. Respect. Discuss. Look into your heart. Cheer you on.

Skin colors are all beautiful to me because I am your sister and I love you.

And I am not afraid.

~~~

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10 Replies

  1. Paulo Cellini

    I’m Paulo Cellini, and I approve this message.
    Very well said, Carol!

    1. carol

      Thanks Paolo. I appreciate that. It hurts my heart every day… ❤️

  2. heiner

    I agree that there are more good people than bad ones on this planet. And probably, most people belief in God or Allah or Buddha or other religious values that demand solidarity, love and peace. Actually lots of things have truely become better during the past 2000 years. But anyways…. Most of the good people still accept the violence and injustice that are still normally present in our societies. We accept enormously rich and enormously poor people. We accept millions of starving people and simultanously spending millions for unnecessary luxury items or flying to the moon. We accept wasting the earths sources and ruining the climate for the wealth of a few. We accept to pay millions for taxes to supply armies and polices to protect the wealthy and privileged people – but there is little money left for health insurances and social securities. We accept the egoism of individuality, calling it self responsibility and “America first” – while religious values would demand the responsibility of the strong ones for the sake of the weak ones.
    How many years will it take ’till we know that too many people have died?? The answer is blowing in the wind…. But i’m afraid it’ll be some many more centuries. Blyb – heiner

    1. carol

      It’s a shame that hateful and hurtful things have become the norm and we don’t feel we can do anything about them. And maybe we can’t. But surely, within our reach there is somebody each of us can help. Even if we feel helpless to save the world, we can each save a small piece of it. Maybe if we all tried, it wouldn’t take so many more centuries…

      Blyb…Carol

  3. Lou

    If there is anyone on the face of this planet that embodies their belief system, who brings to life all that they hold true and dear, it is you my dear sister. I have been blessed with a family who not only cares deeply for their world and the people they share it with, but also manifests those feelings into their everyday lives and actions.

    It is so sad that the actions of some can leave the decent people of this world feeling hopeless, ravaged, torn from end to end. That some people in this world must live their lives being treated in such a way as to be left with no choice but to rise up in anger just to be heard.

    Again, or should I say still, hate rears its ugly head. I cry for those who have to live through life under its weight. But mostly, I cry for the children. For the children crushed under its weight on the receiving end, as well as the children who are violated by being taught that hate and injustice is how the world works.

    The people who fill themselves with this hate, with this self proclaimed entitlement, those who view others to be lesser than them, are only living in a hell of their own making. They will forever be jealous of what they think others have. They are the ones who are not free. They sit in their dark fortresses and glare out over the world always searching for that one thing that will fill their emptiness. What they don’t understand is, that emptiness is the void inside themselves where true love should reside. That is the place within us all that has been set aside for the best that life has to offer. And the best that life has to offer is not a worldly possession. The best is made up of peace, love, acceptance, calm, happiness, and beauty.

    We all experience a portion of these things. But the deep void within us is there because we do not fully embrace these values, these things that would make us whole. I, myself, fall short in this area. There are times when I am not loving, I am not forgiving. It is, after all, part of being human. But our job in this life is to strive to welcome these values into our everyday lives, to open our hearts to our brothers and sisters. Our job is to be for them what we would hope others would be for us. Like our dad used to say, “Children, children, love each other”!

    I have often fallen short, yet I will forever strive to be the person my parents taught me to be.

    1. carol

      We were lucky enough to be raised by two wonderful parents in a time and place so special it still seems magical. I have to remind myself that most people didn’t have that. With that kind of foundation, it is so much easier to be loving towards others, forgiving, helpful. I love your take on this…it’s powerful. I often fall short, too. We can strive together sister! ❤️

  4. Judy S

    How good it is to read your sharing. In 1990, I began as a junior at SUNY Fredonia. I had finished an assoc. degree through 9 years of evening classes at Genesee Comm. College in Batavia, in Quality & Reliability while working at F-P in the quality dept. My goal was a degree in Health Services Administration, May 1992. My daughter finished her art degree at Daemen the week before I was awarded mine in HSA. One of the optional classes was Medical Ethics, not offered very often. As a (ahem) mature student, I really had no idea the games students played…. my group had three junior boys, and me. It’s amazing that any of us got a passing grade, as we were graded as a group. Sigh. At least, I knew I’d done the work. Since then I’ve learned to speak up.

    1. carol

      Wow! That’s a lot of hard work and dedication. I applaud you for that! That must have been fun graduating around the same time as your daughter (or not?).

      My guess is those three boys should be thankful they got paired with you. I have a feeling if it had been four junior boys they wouldn’t have fared so well.

      It’s awesome to have the skill of being able to speak up in your back pocket! I think we all need to use that skill more often. Too often, as Heiner said, we get complacent about the status quo and don’t speak up when we need to. Kudos to you! ❤️

  5. Susan Manry

    Hey Carol. I am behind on emails. I love this writing. I usually have some things to say but I am going to simply say AMEN SISTER for all you wrote. It is a trying time, a sad time, a depressing time. I have shed many tears the last several weeks watching the news. Bottom line is I feel the same as you wrote in your last few sentences, I love, respect and discuss with all people. I too love all skin colors and have many friends who are all different colors. It is the heart of people I fall in love with, not the skin color. Thank you my friend.
    Love, Susan

    1. carol

      I think that sums it up quite nicely! ❤️❤️❤️

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